Saturday, August 1, 2009

Mom, The Wolfman and Me

I am going to tell you all a secret. Something my mom doesn't even know about.


I used to have the biggest crush on Joaquin Phoenix. Notice the emphasis on the words 'used to'.


Just to give you a little history lesson on my crazy and innocent crush.


As a little teen bopper in the late 80's, I used to LOVE his brother River Phoenix. I thought he was the cat's meow. Saw all his movies, read every article about him. Watched him live at the Oscar's and prayed hard that he would win. I even considered stalking him in L.A. when we lived in Cali. It was closed to being obsessed that I could come.


Then he overdosed in front of the Viper Room in Hollywood, and that was all she wrote.



Years later I saw Gladiator and fell head over heels for the tyrannical Commodus. The acting was chilling and I was all about bad boys then. (That would explain the EX husband).





Antyways.


I watched and bought all of his movies, joined his fan club, read every coverage on him from People magazine to GQ, and I even went so far as to attempt to write him a fan letter. I never mailed it.


I even considered putting his name on my license plates. They would have looked like this:

JOAQNPX

The hubby wasn't going for it. I don't blame him. Now.


It was this photo that did it for me last January.

Joaquin + Mountain Beard = SAY WHAT?!?


Okay what is it with actors who have such a brilliant career, and they want to throw it all away to pursue a music career. Yeah I know we've heard it all before, and my crush (even though innocent) died the moment I saw that picture.


Call me shallow, but I can't comprehend the former actor who almost won two Oscars and won one Golden Globe as a rapper. Can you?


He won a Grammy for the soundtrack 'Walk The Line', and now he wants to be a rapper. And guess who is rumored to produce his record? P. Diddy.


Yes people I know, the news is old about Joaquin Phoenix wanting to be a rapper. To prove that he is serious, BIL Casey Affleck is recording a documentary about the whole transition. A rapper who started his career rapping to such titles such as 'I Want A Refund', and droning on and on and trying to rhyme 'boom' and 'room' over and over again. Yes, rapping world beware, there is a new kid in town!


It's not even good rapping like Eminem, but it sounds like something put together on a paper napkin at the bar, two minutes before going on stage.


Yes, this twice nominated Oscar boy of Hollywood used to make my heart go all a flutter, but not anymore.


It's just scary.


And my mom still doesn't know.

17 comments:

Charles Gramlich said...

I guess we all have dreams. But yeah, I saw him on Letterman I think when he was talking about this and thought, the dude has lost it. I liked him as an actor.

*Akilah Sakai* said...

Yum! He is easy on the eyes in Gladiator and the other non-mountain man pic you have up.

Some people think all the filming by Casey is for a documentry and that in the end we find out it was all a big ruse. We shall see ...

Back in the 80s Johnny Depp was my heart. I watched "21 Jump Street" over and over. Can't remember who the others were who had my teenage heart.

carma said...

I am *stunned* at this revelation. He has got to be under the influence of a controlled substance. Oh, and I'm glad you think Eminem is a good rapper as I think so too :D

Lucy said...

Wow, I had no idea he wanted to do RAP, that is funny, in a kind of sad, funny!

When we were in LA, we stayed on Sunset, and walked right past the VIPER Room and he we had no clue.

Here is some Trivia we found out on our trip. Johnny Depp sold the Viper Room because he got sick of tourist coming by see where his friend died.

Anyways, I totally agree with you you, the guy needs to go back to acting and CUT his hair and shave!!!

Christine said...

I hadn't heard about this! Sounds really strange..like he's lost it.

Wendyburd1 said...

I KNOW! Why did he have to go ruin himself and leave movies, he was finally in his prime! I got a crush on HIM after Signs. It was River I adored for so long, I still do. Watching Stand By Me gets me all choked up! And Joaquin was doing so well, movie after awesome movie, WHY did he stop??!! RAP?!

The Mind of a Mom said...

Oh I used to love him also! I saw him in Walk the Line and I was smitten but then just shortly after that he got all weird and I lost that lovin' feeling! LoL

Carina Blogarina said...

Did you see the crazy attiude he showed on the David Letterman show? I was shocked! I must have been high out of his mind! Not a turn on

BIBI said...

I couldn't agree with you more Charles! :)

I believe that it is all a ruse Akilah too. I hope he goes back to pre-rapper state. Ah! What celebrities do for attention!

Oh yes Carma! Eminem is the best that is out there.

True Lucy, so true. I had no idea that Johnny Depp sold the Viper Room. I watched an interesting documentary on the Pussycat dolls and they did perform there before they became big. Who knew?!?

Many believe that he lost it Christine. I think that it is all for show. Or attention.

Isn't it though Wendy?!? You too had a crush on River?!? What a small world. I can't watch 'Stand By Me' without crying either.

I lost it too mom, and I doubt very seriously that I'd get it back. Unless he shaves and wins a Oscar. :)

Not a 'turn on' at all Carina. A real turn off! =(

Thank you all for your comments!

Chelsea Talks Smack said...

poor Joaquin.....I'm seriously worried about the poor thing.

BabYpose said...

Its funny you said the wolfman :) I knew him from The Gladiator, now he's the rapper. Never saw a strange thing coming from him. Hope this is a temporary w-rap up show :)

Joyful said...

I had a similar crush - though it didn't make it to the license plate phase.

I'm still holding out hope that he is going to come out of this and say Just Kidding!

JennyMac said...

Mountain beard is a little crazy but its the way he talks now, and his interview on Letterman...he sounds completely strung out. SO odd.

BIBI said...

Hey Chelsea!Nice to hear from you! I too worry for him. But then again some celebs will do anything for attention.

Yes BabYpose I hope that this is a temporary w-rap up show! HAHAHA!

Hey Joyful girl. You and me both had crazy crushes. Do you still do? I'm still debating. Hmmm...

Yeah Jenny, I think 'strung out' is the right word. Tehehehehe

Tina said...

I used to have a crush on him too.... That was until I saw him on Letterman the other day. I had gotten up to go potty and when I came back, this caveman was there being interviewed. I didn't believe that it was him and had to google it to be sure. Why do good looking guys cover it up with all that facial hair crap? And he wants to be a rapper? He looks homeless, not like any rapper I can think of.

BIBI said...

So true Tina! He is so good looking yet wants to cover it up!

I hope in the near future we all see what this is really about. Maybe he may become as big as Eminem. :)

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